1:40 p.m. - 2003-09-04
Wonder Woman, I'm not...
I think I�ve figured out what my superpower is.
Bro Dave once discerned that he had a superpower � he could make people smoke. Those who didn�t regularly smoke, smoked around him and when he was around smokers, they smoked that much more. It wasn�t an overly impressive, or entirely useful, superpower, but it was his. Personally, I believe it runs in the family, as I have observed the same phenomenon for myself, but I couldn�t really lay claim to it. He had discovered it, it was his. But I finally came up with my own.
I have the uncanny ability to make elevator doors close�when no one is in them.
It�s true. I�ve been conducting tests. Well, maybe not scientific, empirical tests and all that, but it�s definitely a trend that I have observed.
At the office building where I work, there are three elevators all in a row. As it is a relatively small building, there is little traffic so generally one will be waiting for a passenger on the first floor at any time. Everyday, and without fail, I will walk up to the waiting door and it will close only to have the one next to it open. It�s weird and, to be honest, a little freaky.
I first thought it was some paranormal poltergeist that was out to get me. He would follow me in, wait until I got three feet away from the door and start pressing buttons. I have a fear of getting caught the door, so I don�t tend to rush to get it. It�s the same with subways.
But now I know better. It�s my power. Maybe I have some weird electromagnetic force that emanates from my body which only affects mobile electronics. Or maybe the power of my mind is so strong that when I think the door is going to close on my nose, it actually tries to.
In any event, I�m going to have to think of a cool name.
